Mar 4, 1997 Laughing At Each Other (PJS, et al)
Mar 19, 1997 1998 "Fantasy" World Cup Squads (Stephen Davies)
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From: PJS@winwaed.demon.co.uk (PJS)
Subject: Laughing at Each Other (was: Femme fatale crisis)
Newsgroups: alt.sports.soccer.european.uk,rec.sport.soccer
Date: March 4, 1997
Snaps wrote:
> Karel Stokkermans wrote:
> >Meanwhile, we could return to football and don't have to wade through the
> >rather predictable phantasies of a couple of Brits.
>
>Calm down and take your pill, Karel. Here:
>
>Lokomotiv Grniskonski 1-0 Pnedepr Hkskinjatol
>(Dmaflyev 86, pen)
>
>Happy?
You just made these teams up! (and the guy you replied to is Austrian anyway!)
I wonder what British teams sound like to speakers of Czech or Polish?
Kentucky Fried Chicken League Division 14:
Swichenstham Falstaff 2 Grock Academic Queens 1
(Tumble 14, 81) (Thwengstackly 66)
(Gargoyle sent off 80)
That makes me think about some other countries idiosyncratic names and
spellings:
Dutch Eredivisie:
Trojan Horse Grendringdijk 1 We Always Win Bangerlend 1
(Hoot 11) (Van Jaeiouoowden 45)
Iceland:
B 2 K 0
(Haraldur Thor Haraldursson 8, 55)
Georgia:
Zugdidi Tskhvalkhilia 10 Makzavia KM-1917 Tkhindvladi 0
(Orshvkhlbkzlevkhtzlzedze 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10)
(Everybody sent off, 11)
Turkey:
Bizleriglispor 0 Lahcaglokspor 2
(Genghis 16, Batu 75)
(match abandoned after 80 minutes due to exchange of heavy artillery fire)
and finally Lithuania:
Siauskiairiris Zorgrus Vilnius 1 FK Algirdas Taurendalas* 1
(Brandobaris 67) (Vercingetorix 40)
* formerly "Glorious Five Year Plan Taurendalas"
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From: stokkerm@cosy.sbg.ac.at (Karel Stokkermans)
Subject: Re: Laughing at Each Other
Date: March 5, 1997
Snaps wrote:
>Lokomotiv Grniskonski 1-0 Pnedepr Hkskinjatol
>(Dmaflyev 86, pen)
>Happy?
How could I be, if you don't indicate what competition this was played for?
Hardly can archive it like this, now, can I?
PJS wrote:
>You just made these teams up! (and the guy you replied to is Austrian anyway!)
What does my being Austrian have anything to do with it? Not that I am
Austrian, fortunately.
>I wonder what British teams sound like to speakers of Czech or Polish?
I know what
Hartlepool Boys Welfare Old Boys vs South Shields Cleadon Social Club
sounds like, to me ;-). (No, I didn't make those names up, and yes, they
play in the same league, or at least did so last year.)
> Trojan Horse Grendringdijk 1 We Always Win Bangerlend 1
> (Hoot 11) (Van Jaeiouoowden 45)
That would be Bangerland or Bangerend, I assume, and their scorer undoubtedly
is Van Jaaioeiouden.
> Zugdidi Tskhvalkhilia 10 Makzavia KM-1917 Tkhindvladi 0
> (Orshvkhlbkzlevkhtzlzedze 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10)
Wouldn't that be Orshvkhlbkzlevkhtzlzadze?
> Siauskiairiris Zorgrus Vilnius 1 FK Algirdas Taurendalas* 1
> (Brandobaris 67) (Vercingetorix 40)
Vercingetorix??? In Lithuania???
PS I've always had a penchant for the KuPS-KePS and NAC-NEC pairings, myself.
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From: PJS@winwaed.demon.co.uk (PJS)
Subject: Re: Laughing at Each Other
Date: March 5, 1997
All Lithuanian names sound like ancient Barbarian chieftains - who else would
elect a presidnet called Vytautis Landsbergis? Some real Lithuanian players
include Darius Maciulevicius and Arturas Jakeliunas ...
Northern Ireland:
Invincible Legions Advancing
with Bright Spears Numerous as Stars 3 Grumpy Old Men 1
(P. O'Neill 33, 48, J. O'Neill 89) (H. O'Neill 14)
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From: Geoff King
Subject: Re: Laughing at Each Other
Date: March 5, 1997
I can tell you as a Canadian that I found it unusual to watch any
European matches at first... To watch, it was more like:
Corporate Sponsorship League:
Hewlett-Packard 2 JVC 1
(Adidas 15, 50) (Adidas 20)
Now though, sports in North America are getting more and more like
that (thanks Nike!), and televised matches over there don't give the
same advertising opportunities as our stop time games do here.
Imagine the Superbore without commercials - actually, better not, it's
heresy, I'll bet.
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From: "Peter Wilman"
Subject: Re: Laughing at Each Other
Date: March 5/ March 14, 1997
You forgot South Africa:
Happy Vultures 0 Dangerous Darkies 7
(unregistered player 3, 14, 27 (1pen), Zulu 44,
59, spectator 66,70)
match abondoned in 89th minute due to bush fire.
I kid you not, those teams really do exist, as do Giant Blackpool (although
they may have been sold and changed their name - again!), Sheffield Sundays,
Real Liverpool, Bloemfontein Celtic, Witbank Black Aces, Moroka Swallows,
Orlando Pirates, Amazulu, Kaiser Chiefs, Umtata Bucks, Hellenic, Cape Town
Spurs, Manning Rangers, et al. Although given the structure of the football
league in SA many teams have financial difficulties and change hands more
than Barry Fry signs players.
Ek kan ook nie onthou die Afrikaanse wword vir 'surprised' nie.
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From: PJS@winwaed.demon.co.uk (PJS)
Subject: Re: Laughing at Each Other
Date: March 10, 1997
Late result from the League of Wales:
Nant Orfachllanwyddfa 4 Real Sociedad de Rhondda Valley 2
(Jones 18, Jones 25,79 (Jones 8, 59)
Jones 88)
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From: steve d
Subject: 1998 "Fantasy" WC Squads
Date: March 19, 1997
Brazil
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Pinnochio
Libero
Vimto Momento Borneo Tango
Cheerio Subbuteo
Scenario Portfolio Fellatio
Subs: Placebo, Stereo (R), Brasso, Stereo (L)
Yugoslavia
--------
Itch
Annoyingitch Hardtoreachitch Scratchanitch
Hic Sic Slic Pric
Digaditch Fallinaditch
Sewastitch
Subs:
Mowapitch, Letsgetrich, Shesabitch
Russia
----------
Whodyanicabolicov
Ticlycov Chesticov Nasticov
Slalomsky Downhillsky
Pastryshev Swedishshev Mastershev
Sodov Taykitov
Subs:
Rubitov, Sendimov, Fucov, Risky
Romania
------------
Chatanoogaciouciou
Atishiou Blessiou Thankyiou
Buscu Snookercu
Pennyciou Twoapennyciou Fourapennyciou
I’llgetciou Uanhoosarmi
Subs:
U, Manu, Stuffyiou
Denmark
-----------
Toomanigoalssen
Tryandstopussen Crapdefenssen Haveagossen Legshurtssen
Firstsson Seccondsson Thirdsson
Wherestheballssen
Getthebeerssen Overthemoonssen
Subs:
Howmanygoalsisthatssen, Finallygaveupcountinssen,
Hurryupandblowthewhistlerefssen
Italy
-----------
Baloni
Potbelli Buggermi Giveitsumwelli
Wotsontelli Toonsgotkenni Onetoomani
Legslikejelli Spendapenni
Wobblijelli Beerbelli
Subs:
Cantthinkofani
Mexico
---------
Juan Neel
Costa Brava Hopelez Juan Andonly Manuel Gearbox
Don Criformi-Argentina Bodegas Luis Canon Sombrero
Manuel Labour Jesus Maria Don Key
Subs:
Burrito
Jose Canyouseebythedawnsearlylight
Speedy Gonzalez
Netherlands
----------------
Hertz Van Rental
Van Diemansland Van der Valk Van Gard Ad van Tagus
Van Sprokendown Van Coova Aye van Hoe Van Iller
Van Erealdizeez Transit van Dors
Subs:
Van Ishincreme, Van Morrison, Dick van Dyke, Per Vert
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From: algor@zeta.org.au (Thomas Esamie)
Subject: Re: 1998 "Fantasy" WC Squads
Date: Mar 20, 1997
Australia
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Bruce
Bruce
Bruce Bruce Bruce Bruce
Bruce Bruce Bruce
Bruce Bruce